Monday 19 October 2009

Things I Say All the Time

Quite a few bloggers have done this recently in some fashion, so I thought I'd steal the idea. You know me. Anyway, sometimes I say the following so much that even I get sick of them:

- close your mouth when your chewing. (My personal little "thing".) Actually, the Ball & Chain does eat with his mouth closed, but he eats Grape Nuts every day and it sounds like he's crunching gravel. I can't even stay in the kitchen when he's having his breakfast.

- sit down, you haven't finished eating (as teen walks away with mouth full of food). Not only is this extremely bad mannered, it also means that there will be crumbs (or worse) on the floor after the meal. I don't even like it when they get up to load the dishwasher, even though I know I should be truly thankful for that little miracle.

- I'm standing right next to you. Not only do I have kids, I have American kids, whose idea of a quiet conversation usually involves them talking to me as if I'm in the next room.

- I'm sorry, it's been a terrible year. Even though we have caller ID on our phone, some crafty charities now show up as a regular, local residential number which I therefore answer. Being British and therefore too polite just to put the phone down on them, I usually take about twenty minutes to extricate myself from the call. Not any more.

- It doesn't get washed if it doesn't reach the laundry basket. Enough said really. They all know where the laundry room is, and it's very close to their bedrooms. And I'm not a slave, contrary to all appearances.

- Why didn't you ask me last night? I have told the kids that I will help them do or find anything if they ask me at least twelve hours before they need to depart for school. However, if they leave it till it's a full-blown international crisis, they're on their own with it.

- There are two types of vegetable on your plate. Pick one and eat it all. Despite the on-going "allergy" to veggies, I insist on my kids eating at least one that's on their plate. No arguments. Just pick one.

(I've just noticed that there's not a nice saying in the above list. What on earth does that say about me?)

.

18 comments:

  1. The 'close your mouth when you chew' is used a great deal in our house, although the 4 year old has it mastered, the 2 year old is still a work in progress!

    and as much as I try, I admit that my girls are 'American' and a whisper here is not like a whisper of good mannered children back home...what is it with that?

    aaaah...I sound more andmore like my bloody mother every day. Someone shoot me!

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  2. They're all my favorites, too!
    And hanging up on some people makes me want to go get a cigarette....
    Sandi

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  3. Some of those sound like me! I'd like to add 'Finish what's in your mouth before talking' to the 'close your mouth when chewing' It's one of my huge pet hates....I've now got it down to a 'look' only, so I don't have to say it that often, progress!

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  4. What does it say about you? Ummm - that you're a mum? (And there are no swear words in there so I actually think you're doing quite well...)

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  5. What does the list say about you?

    That you have teenagers...

    and you're doing your job correctly!

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  6. Agree with PM. Having spent a very long, wet weekend on my own with the boys I have almost lost my voice with screaming STOP, NO, and YOU SILLY BOY. So your list sounds quite mild by comparison...

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  7. Very good list & quite reasonable. So that makes you very reasonable I suppose!

    I keep saying *Close the door* as all the grandchildren leave draughts coming in through open doors. This leads to *Were you born in a barn?*
    *Hand over mouth when you cough*
    *Have you washed your hands?* (after toilet)
    *Don't forget your coat/lunchbox/reading book bag.*
    *What do you say?* (Trying to promote please & thank you.)

    Just a few things we say repeatedly most days.

    Nuts in May

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  8. A few that come to mind:

    @ "Because I'm the boss."

    @ "If you don't like me, feel free to find another mother."

    @ "How many times have I told you..."

    @ "As soon as you pay the bills."

    I so enjoy my empty-nest life! ;)

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  9. mmmh. I agree with the laundry basket one for sure. I would like to add
    'hang the clothes up- they do not belong on the floor'
    'have you been to lost property ( at school) yet?'
    'do you have everything you need for tomorrow? ( night before school). Sigh

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  10. Yep I can pretty much relate to all of these. The one thing I say all the time, though, that drives my family nuts, is 'Umm,' when I walk into a room, without following through. I tell them it's because I have so much to think about, taking care of them.

    Liz (LivingwithKids)
    www.kidstart.co.uk/livingwithkids

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  11. You've seen the Anita Renfrew act using the William Tell overture, I take it? If not, let me know and I'll find it on youtube for you.

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  12. Ah yes - that is one brilliant video clip.

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  13. PLEASE may I have... (when my children ask for something) comes out of my mouth about a hundred times a day. The obviously ignire what I say as they never say it.

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  14. This was great! I was thinking of my own list and may steal your idea one day....it would definitely include 'please stop saying like' in it somewhere...that's gotta be my kids favorite word.

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  15. Excellent! I may even write a few down, as I'm a new step-mom to an 11 and 13 year old. I really like the 12 hour notice rule. Will definitely remember that one!

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  16. Didn't get past number 1 & had to comment and say THANK YOU for making me feel better. My OH did used to eat with his mouth open till I nagged him and even now he sounds noisy. So noisy I have to clench my teeth and try not to look murderous but he sees me and gets defensive. Oh, it's terrible.
    But it's not just me, so thanks :-)

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  17. Am dreading the day I am going to find out that little L's first word is 'No'. I know it's going to happen.

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