It's better than TV

So we've had the pup for over a month now. (See what a good mother I am? I don't even know exactly how long. It's all a blur). She seemed quite mellow at first, which I deemed a good thing. Who wants a dog that races around, bites for fun with really big teeth and jumps on the sofa eh? Unfortunately the mellowness was due to the pneumonia she had at the time. When the two week course of anti-biotics ("$160 please ma'am") worked its magic she reverted to type- not very mellow.

It's a bit like having a toddler in the house again. When it goes very quiet, she's usually up to no good. "Up to no good" includes, dragging the occasional shoe outside for a quick chew, taking silk sofa cushions outside for sun-bathing purposes, lying in the flower beds and squashing everything flat, sloping off to the kids' bedrooms and rolling around on the beds or licking their homework, eating two thirds of a defrosting chicken dinner (thank god it was cooked.) I could go one but you'll get my drift I'm sure.

We are getting hours of entertainment at her expense though. Last weekend, the Ball & Chain and father-in-law decided that leaving the back door open all the time for the dog, lets flies in.

(Side note - two ways to really piss off Americans is to a) leave screen doors open, and b) leave actual doors open when the air conditioning is on. The latter usually elicits phrases like "Are we trying to cool down the whole of Illinois?")

I forbade the installation of a regular screen door when we moved in here. For those not in the know, such screen doors open outwards and are often spring-loaded, meaning that you open that door, then wedge your foot/bum/knee against it while you attempt to put the key in the real door and open that one. Try doing that carrying three bags of stuff and a toddler. I don't think so.

We used to have one of these, that hangs from the lintel and doesn't involve screws and swearing. (Not my dog or house BTW). Dog pulled that down first time she tried to walk through it.

Anyway,  a retractable screen door was slyly purchased and installed in my absence. See how it works? The retracted screen is housed in the thicker side of the door frame on the left.  I have to admit it does the trick (ie. keeps the flies out) although it's a real pain having to let the dog in and out all the time, so during the day (when I'm on my own here) I sneakily don't use it. I know!

The best thing is however, that the dog often can't tell whether the screen door is open or closed, so she goes flying up the stairs to the back door and smashes straight into the screen. This would be funny enough, but the screen then whizzes back to the other side of the door frame - retracting - risking canine heart attack. She has done this almost every day this week and now won't go near the door at all.

I shouldn't really laugh, but it's hilarious.

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