Just when I'm about to throw in the towel and declare myself totally out of blogging material, along comes a gift. This times it's in the form of Gold's Gym, a chain of fitness centers/centres or gyms here in the States. Golds has declared July "Cankle Awareness Month".
Oh sorry, I'm ahead of myself - time for some definitions. Apparently a cankle, also known as "peasant ankle", refers to the seamless blend of calf and ankle - and that's not a good thing.
To quote ver batim:
“Cankles are the fastest growing ‘aesthetic affliction’ in the United States … even ahead of other bathing suit killers like Muffin Tops, Saddle Bags and Moobs,” says Gold’s new cankle Web site www.saynotocankles.com. “Millions of people across the country are currently affected by Cankles and millions more are ‘at risk.’ In fact, it is estimated that if current trends continue, by the year 2012 Cankles will surpass Love Handles as the number one aesthetic affliction in the world.”
Hmmm. I'm not sure I'd go as far as calling them the "number one aesthetic affliction", given how easy it is to cover them up. Even in the height of summer, if you're unhappy with the shape of your lower leg, you can still wear loose lightweight fabrics, much as we upper-arm challenged individuals can wear loose fitting sleeves. Sorry - I'm starting to sound like Trinny and Suze, but they've been right about these things for years now. Just look at what Gold's is suggesting as wardrobe options for the cankled among us:
- Look for pants in soft fabrics like cotton or poly blends that drape loosely around the ankle. Skinny jeans, which bunch at the ankle, are a no-no.
- Choose cropped or slightly tapered pants that cuff just past the fullest part of the ankle. These will draw the eye to the thinnest part of the ankle. (if anyone's read the What Not to Wear books, T&S would damn you to hell for touching any kind of tapered pant.)
- Avoid shoes with ankle straps; these only make the ankle look bigger and the leg shorter. Opt instead for wedges and platform sandals that will create a long, lean silhouette. For fall, invest in dark-colored and tight-fitting boots.
As someone who inherited her father's disproportionately skinny ankles, I can't really relate to this problem. (Before anyone thinks I'm being smug here, I have about fifteen other dodgy body parts to contend with thank you.) If you don't believe me, here's the proof, but PUT YOUR SUNGLASSES ON NOW.
You were warned!