As some of you'll know, there's quite a gap between my teenagers and the Little Guy. 10 and 7 years to be exact. Since he's surrounded by "adults" most of the time, his sense of humo(u)r and vocabulary tend to reflect that.
Here's a few recent examples:
LG takes a full 12.5 minutes to brush his teeth one morning before school (while singing Bohemian Rhapsody and a few other ditties); meanwhile the Ball & Chain and I are standing at the front door, eyes to heaven, dying a very slow death. LG comes trotting along the hall way as if nothing's wrong. Then he announces, "You know why I took so long to brush my teeth?" (Dramatic pause of five seconds.) "To teach you guys patience".
The other night he said he was too tired to finish his reading homework. Can't really argue with that, so I put him to bed, with the promise that he would get up extra early and finish it. I voiced my skepticism, and he voiced his indignation at my skepticism. (Note American spelling.) Next morning I had to wake him up, as usual. When I reminded him of his intention to get up early, from under the covers came "Change of plans."
On our recent trip to Costa Rica, where he seemed determined to consume the country's entire supply of seafood, he asked what a certain fish on his plate was. "Mahi Mahi" I told him. "Mmmmm", he replied. "Delish for me-hee me-hee."
The best one came last weekend when the Queenager came home from college. Little Guy had pinned a note to the front door saying:
"Q, you make our quartet a quintet again, and I'm privileged to say "Welcome Home"!" (OK, I know it's a little over the top but he came up with it all by himself).
Now, if I could just get him to stop practicing his "movie kisses" on my cheek, all would be well!