Thursday, March 7, 2013

Beiber - Gotta Know Your Audience

So, I'm hearing that Justin le Bieber went on stage at the O2 in London over TWO HOURS LATE. What was he thinking? Who does he have advising him? Has he not read my book?

Look at how outraged these Brits were.

And he clearly doesn't realize his fan base is 90% pre-teens, who -

a) usually go to bed at 9pm or earlier
b) don't have their own money to pay the outrageous ticket prices (ie. parents pay)
c) have to drag parents along with them, meaning double the expense

Does he not know that Brits are a punctual people? Some of these punctual parents, conscious of the need to get said pre-teens up for school next day, had to leave before the Bieber-god even entered stage-left above.

Major crotch pain or what?

Clearly he hasn't read my book, nor have any of his, so-called "advisors". Justin baby, ditch your quote unquote "advisors" - next time you tour the UK, I can help you or, (if I can't fit you in) I can put you in touch with a lot of people who can help you.

So, although Justin missed the punctuality boat this time, other mega-global-pop-icons or whatever the hell you call yourselves, take note -
  • British people take deadlines, entrance times and anything in between very seriously. (They won't fight about it, but there will be a lot of passive aggression in the air.)
  • They also take kids' bedtimes seriously. 
  • You might be a demi-god to kids, but to the parents you're just another little snot who's inconveniencing them and worse, upsetting their offspring.
  • There will always be a paparazzo nearby to record their outrage and send it viral
As the saying goes, "Time waits for no man boy!"


  1. I'd call him just another ugly American, except that he's Canadian. But he certainly is a spoiled little rock star.

  2. Quite obviously noone told him either about the fact that public transport from the O2 stops at around 11pm....


    LCM x

  3. Sounds advice! But i'd be kind of terrified that the Beiber boy will now contact you to be his manager and 'go to girl' about British culture. Although if you do meet him please find out the real reason why his voice does not seem to have broken yet? Has he been chemically castrated? We demand to know!

  4. I'm chuckling at the comments as much as the post--and I LOVE the fact that Mike knows more than me about Beiber.

    Overly inflated egos do weird things to people.

  5. A very similar thing happened to us when we took our then 9-year-old daughter to see some girl band (I forget who now, they've duly disappeared since) at Birmingham Arena. The main act was 1.5 hours late and by that stage at 10 pm, my daughter and her friends were half-asleep. Worse for us parents was that, as well as having to listen to (and pay for!) the appalling singing, we had a three-hour drive home in the middle of the night. And it was mid-week.

    Boy am I glad my children have grown out of boy and girl bands and can now take themselves to overpriced concerts….

    Great post, as always.

    Helena xx


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