Why I Will Never be a Morning Person

So, the Ball & Chain sent me this link to a CNN piece about being a morning person. Do you think he was trying to make a point? We've been married for over 24 years; it's a bit late, mate.

I read it with little some interest, and of course, had an answer for each one of the points. I'll deal with the first batch today -

The piece begins by saying that only about 1 in 10 people are truly morning people. Oh good, that makes me feel a bit better. I have to get up at 7 most days, and even though I'm usually in bed by 10.30 or 11pm, I swear I wake up knackered every morning. It has been suggested before (by a few doctors) that I might have very mild sleep apnea, and indeed I do seem to inhale myself awake during the night. Not snoring, but just a large intake of breath that wakes me up. That and the fact that I have the hearing ability of a bat, makes for some very sleepless nights.

Anyway, some of the points weren't at all helpful to me.

Plan ahead - what like make sure you're getting enough sleep? Well, as I said, in theory, I am. Next.

Maintain good sleep hygiene - At first I thought that meant make sure your nightie's nice and clean, but what it means is be consistent with your bed times. Check. You can't get more consistent than being the owner of a dog who takes herself to her bed at 10.30 every night.

Take your time - what, you mean walk up the stairs slowly? Actually this means make sure you have good work/life balance. Hmmm - for parents of young kids, this might be a bit of a stretch if you're helping with homework till god knows when and then you spend the next few hours picking up toys etc., making lunches, doing the laundry etc. Sometimes it's out of your control. With me it's an 11 year old whose new bedtime is 9pm, and believe me it's full on till then. Once he's gone to bed I start with the admin stuff. No surprise that I rarely watch TV shows.

Implement a routine - since I rarely go out on a school night, there's definitely a routine here. Some might call it a rut, but it's definitely consistent.

Nap cautiously - What I would give for the chance to nap in the middle of the day. No - this one's not a problem.

Eat and drink smart - apart from the dodgy grammar, they say don't go to bed too full or too hungry, and avoid caffeine and alcohol before bed. Oh....

Power down - the light from computers, I-pads etc is known to keep your brain firing on all cylinders for at least half an hour after you switch them off, but that's not a problem for me since there's usually huge piles of stuff to clear up before I head upstairs.

Prep before bed - lunches, backpacks, work stuff. Yes, yes, and yes. We morning haters would rather stay up into the night than have to get up any earlier to do it. I draw the line at making the sandwiches at night, (who wants soggy sarnies?) but I make sure I have what I need for them so there are no panics next day.

Get cozy - have your bed cool and quiet, with a good mattress if possible. Well, living where I do I don't have much control over the decibel issues, although I have been known to insert a pair of wax ear plugs on occasion. And yes, I'm not one for lacy night wear (is that TMI) so I'm always cozy in my PJs.

Any other suggestions?