Thursday, January 7, 2010

The Best of Intentions

I don't know, I just thought the new school year would kick off with a little more, hmmm, organization/organisation.  I'd had two weeks of sitting around with not enough to do while everyone else was out on the slopes. The "reminders" and "to-do" lists had used up all the memory on my phone. I have significantly reduced my Pinot Grigio intake, mainly due to histamine reactions to the merest whiff, so my mind is razor sharp. (OK, poetic license/licence there.)

I made all kids go to bed at a reasonable time on Sunday night, the backpacks were ready at the door, the PE clothes washed and ready, cell phones, keys and other paraphernalia located. Oh yeah....2010 is bringing some changes, I thought.

Now, I admit that we were an hour behind on Monday morning, having spent two weeks on Mountain Time instead of Central Time, so waking up was going to be a challenge. The Ball & Chain usually gets up five minutes before me and makes so much noise that there's no way I could ever fall back to sleep, but since he's on a quote unquote "conference", I was in charge. Managed to wake the man-child a whole ten minutes before he had set his alarm - not a happy camper, to put it mildly.

"Oh for god's sake it's only ten minutes" I said. He displayed a surprisingly dry wit for a just-woken teen when he punched back with "Oh yeah, 'cause you wouldn't mind at all". I sloped off, stage right.

The Queenager said she was awake when I popped my head in, but she could have been sleep-talking.  The Little Guy - was nowhere to be seen. At 6, he's perfecty capable of getting his own breakfast, as long as I don't mind wiping up the half gallon of milk that doesn't make it into the cereal bowl, so I wasn't worried. I'm not thrilled about him getting up earlier than 7am though. Why? Because he can't tell the time yet (eek) so neither of us have any idea how long he has been up. Has he been watching TV for two minutes or two hours? How much sleep did he actually get?

Anyhoo, after much questioning, the teenagers were allowed to leave for school. (Phone? Keys? PE stuff? Homework?) "Mom", they wailed as one, with maximum lack of patience, and much eye-rolling.

And yes, it happened.

Two minutes before leaving with Little Guy, came the first phone call. It was so predictable that even LG said "Oh that must be one of them."

Me: "Yes", stretching out the word for maximum effect.
Queenager: "Oh thank god you're still there." (Playing to an audience of at least six high schoolers, I deduced.)
Me: "Well...."
Queenager: "I forgot my math homework. Can you bring it please."
Me: "What, - the stuff you were panicking about last week and have been working on ALL weekend?"
Queenager:  "OK, OK. Pleeeeze can you bring it? Thanks. Love ya."

Thirty seconds before leaving, there it goes again.

Me: "What now?"
Man-child: "Whuh?"
Me: "Oh it's you. What's the matter?"
M-C: "Hey. Mom? (Pause) I forgot my key. You will be in at 3.30pm won't you?"
Me: "What if I'm not?" (Like I go anywhere.)
M-C: "Mom". Again with the hour-long word.
Me: "Yes, I suppose so". (Implying huge sacrifice on my part.)
M-C: "Cool. (Pause) See ya".

Oh well. What's that song?  Tomorrow, tomorrow......



  1. Oh, poor you! When B&C returns from his "conference" he needs to send you to a spa since you were sick the whole vacation. Hope day two runs a little smoother.

  2. lol....our life, noone has a clue, an iota of an idea what its like with kids, school days.....then in a heartbeat its over....I see it coming the dynamic changing before my eyes, no subtleties here anymore...just CHANGE...

    no down time...yet a while

    saz x
    a great post for MMM too

  3. But of course they remembered their cell phones? (Or were they calling from the school office?)

  4. Yep can totally identify with this - just went into No 1 Son's bedroom and it looks as though it's been hit by a hot air balloon, even though I made sure everything was tidy on Monday night ready for the (brief, before the snow!) return to school. Very funny post x

  5. And I thought getting the Littleboys ready for preschool was dreading the day when they have to remember their own belongings.

  6. But I thought it was going to get better when they're teenagers and I don't have to take them to school? Please don't tell me it gets worse!

  7. My parents tried to teach me the hard way not to forget my stuff - like they wouldn't pick up the phone or wouldn't be at home after school. I learnt a lot from that. E.g. how to open a front door with a credit card and a coat hanger.

  8. Resolutions? Pah!
    As someone far wiser than me said "you live your life how you live your day"

  9. I was resolute to stay calm and relaxed this year. Well-that lasted five minutes......

  10. things to come...thanks for the reality check

  11. I was getting tense shoulders reading this--I was ok until the first phone call then I became irritable and wanted to snap at someone. I would have done the same as you, but would have given them the look when I saw them next, then the pursed lips. You're very good, they're very lucky!

  12. I like the "Mooooooommmmmmmmm" bit. I still do that with mine! ;)

  13. Kids!!! But we love them so much. The teen calls sound so familiar!!!

  14. Its all so typical, no matter where you live.

    Nuts in May

  15. LIke Nappy Valley Girl, I thought getting ready to go to nursery was bad, I hadn't factored in at least I'm in charge of remembering everything... not looking forward to the additional work of having them responsible for their stuff! x

  16. OK, now I know what I'll be posting about in ten years time ... Doesn't it kill you they call you mom! MOM!


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