Don't Help Me, Whatever You Do

Some of you closet Daily Mail readers (and I know you're out there) may have seen this story about the Scots woman who went into a pen of "tame" cheetahs and ended up being mauled.

First of all, cheetahs are freakin' wild animals with big teeth and not-very-retractable claws; their dictionary's version of "tame" is probably not the same as the Oxford English version. Second, why would you get into a pen with anything that's a) bigger than you and b) includes humans in its carnivorous diet? And several of them to boot?

Anyway, I'm happy to report that the woman is OK, but came very close to losing facial features, according to the doctors. She'll probably be having nightmares for years to come I expect, as will anyone who witnessed it.

Except her husband, that is. He's too busy high-fiving himself since he managed to sell the photos to a national (nay, international) newspaper. Yes, you read that correctly. Her HUSBAND took the photos.

They're really good aren't they? I mean you can tell that those cheetahs are on a serious mission. There's even blood dripping down her neck. Good job husband.

Now, in all fairness, he was allegedly outside the pen, and was presumably stopped from going in to rescue his damsel. (At least I hope he was prevented otherwise he has a shedload of groveling to do.) But still,  if you were in the same position, watching a loved one potentially being killed in front of your eyes, would your first thought be to grab the Nikon and start capturing the memories?

What IS the world coming to?