Friday 4 May 2012

Don't Help Me, Whatever You Do

Some of you closet Daily Mail readers (and I know you're out there) may have seen this story about the Scots woman who went into a pen of "tame" cheetahs and ended up being mauled.

First of all, cheetahs are freakin' wild animals with big teeth and not-very-retractable claws; their dictionary's version of "tame" is probably not the same as the Oxford English version. Second, why would you get into a pen with anything that's a) bigger than you and b) includes humans in its carnivorous diet? And several of them to boot?

Anyway, I'm happy to report that the woman is OK, but came very close to losing facial features, according to the doctors. She'll probably be having nightmares for years to come I expect, as will anyone who witnessed it.

Except her husband, that is. He's too busy high-fiving himself since he managed to sell the photos to a national (nay, international) newspaper. Yes, you read that correctly. Her HUSBAND took the photos.

They're really good aren't they? I mean you can tell that those cheetahs are on a serious mission. There's even blood dripping down her neck. Good job husband.

Now, in all fairness, he was allegedly outside the pen, and was presumably stopped from going in to rescue his damsel. (At least I hope he was prevented otherwise he has a shedload of groveling to do.) But still,  if you were in the same position, watching a loved one potentially being killed in front of your eyes, would your first thought be to grab the Nikon and start capturing the memories?

What IS the world coming to?

14 comments:

  1. Wow, I didn't hear about this one, but have to agree ... what is the world cominb to? Scary stuff.

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  2. Or even coming to?? Fix that typo for me please!!

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  3. You are so right - very scary. Clearly a photo opportunity - although, I have to say, tempting as regards ex's......Lx

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  4. I'm surprised he didn't immediately post it to Facebook and send a quick Twitpic while he was at it....

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  5. Hubby and I just had a very serious discussion. I love a good blog post as much as anyone, however, I told him that he has my permission to throw the camera at the cats if I'm ever being mauled. I also told him, in case he didn't know, that if he ever takes pictures while I'm be treated as a cat toy, he will have me to deal with. If I survive, that is. He responded, "But darling, you will just outrun them." Now see, that's just not funny. I've recently taken up running. Any excuse to tease me is catnip to that man. What is this world coming to? I wonder if her hubby is thinking... "Best fiver I've ever spent."

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  6. Ha ha ha. Given than my husband has never taken a family photo in the 22 years we've been married, I am just assuming that when the neighbours' dogs get me, he won't even think about getting the I-phone out!

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  7. Having just been in a pen with a couple of cheetahs while on holiday in South Africa I've cme over all well kinda wek...I do love them BUT I have HUGE respect for them too they are WILD and yep their claws aint retractable however loud they purr!

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  8. Yet another contender for the Darwin Awards.

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  9. I have to say in all fairness that if I'd gone to a wildlife park that offered an opportunity to pet what the park assured me were 'tame' cheetahs, I might very well have gone in there too. We were in Bangkok in December and went to a tiger sanctuary run by Buddhist monks where we (and many many others) were petting 'tame' tigers. I suppose that could have just as easily happened to us.

    I'm fairly certain, though, that, if I'd been the victim, my husband would have devoted his energy to helping me rather than creating a photodocumentary.

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  10. Although I like a risk as much as the next person, when the entire situation is out of my control (ie. "Tame" animals going loco) I tend to assume that the 1% chance of it going wrong, will actually come true.

    And when I was zip-lining above the trees in Costa Rica last month, I just didn't look down!

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  11. I can't believe any man would be so cruel as that!
    Well maybe I can........
    Maggie X

    Nuts in May

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  12. Reminds me of a photo taken by a husband a few years ago of his wife and a friend standing on a rock in a river in front of what was, in the first frame, a small waterfall but which, by the last, had become a raging torrent which swept them both away to their deaths. Hubby was too busy twiddling his lens to notice. But at least he got a nice smiley last picture to remember them by!

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  13. OMG - that's a terrible story!

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