People search for the funniest things

I spent a little time over the weekend trying to become more of a technical blogger. Notice the lovely little RSS feed widget to the right. I have no idea what it's going to do, but a few people have suggested I put one in (or is it "on") so I thought I'd give it a go. It was very easy even for me, but as I said, I'm not exactly sure what it's for.

I have had Statcounter on my book web site for years and I recently stuck it on this blog too. Once you have an account you can add more web sites or blogs, so that was really a no brainer. Besides, I'm a bit nosy and I love to see where people are coming from.

One of the things StatCounter gives you are the keywords people used in the search that led them to your blog. It certainly makes you wonder about some people, especially these ones:

- "gifts for a skinny little Irishman that will make him love me". I'm sorry - I'm completely missing the connection between me and skinny little Irishmen. OK I recently guest posted for Yummie Mammy as she moved back to England from Ireland, but even that's a bit of a stretch wouldn't you say?

- "pattern for hat with fleece dreadlocks". Hmmm, my little guy wears one of them to school now and then, so I'm hoping I don't have a stalker. I'm also a bit of a sewer and I actually have one of those patterns in a cupboard upstairs somewhere. OK, this one is starting to creep me out.

- "I am a woman, hear me roar. I am a mother, hear me purr". First of all, who types something this long as an Internet search? And second, how in god's name did I fetch up in the results? My kids would wet their collective pants if they read that in association with my particular style of mothering.

- "Raingo gutter reviews". I'm almost stumped by this one, except I've just bought myself a new pair of wellies with a smart bit of tweed fabric on the side panel. (Styling for once in my life). It really is starting to look like someone's spying on me.

- "Mean things to say to British people" - and I'm on the list? What have I said? I mentally went back through my recent posts and I swear I haven't said anything mean about Brits. I mean why would I? I'm one myself.

- "Government pharmacist". Apart from the fact that I don't think there are such things in the US, I did spend rather a lot of time last week in one pharmacist or another, getting prescriptions for the gammy shoulder and heat pads. OK, now I know someone's definitely following me around.

If I go missing in the next few days, just remember this post. (I could also have run off to the Bahamas for a bit of a lie-down, but it's unlikely.)